In March 1957, between winter and spring quarters of my Senior year and of Karen’s Junior year, we went on the KSU annual tour of New York City. Written details of this experience have never existed, but the memories have been indelibly preserved in the neural pathways of my mind. They have been inscribed upon the foundation stones of my heart.
On the way to the City, I presented her with my fraternity pin, an event called “pinning.” For many collegians, this action was equivalent to becoming engaged. And so, it was for the two of us.
The pinning was the conclusion of an earlier promise made on Valentine’s Day, a month before our trip. It was then, in the Robin Hood Restaurant in Kent, that I had offered Karen my mother’s ring: a green gemstone with a diamond chip that she had given me to be passed on to the woman I would choose to continue wearing her, and my, favorite piece of jewelry. Many years later, this ring was handed on to our granddaughter, Victoria, since this was also my mother’s name.
But now on March 16, someplace in the middle of the state of New York, Karen accepted my DU-pin and my pledge. The pin was stolen by a burglar thirty years ago; the pledge has been repeatedly renewed.
The places I had visited when I made my first tour of the City the preceding year, I saw once again, but in a different light, a brighter illumination. For Karen the sights were new. I enjoyed sharing them with her, even if the details were never included in a journal as had those of 1956.
There was Rockefeller Center, its coffee shop and its skaters’ pond where we watched the passing crowds. St Patrick’s Cathedral, where we went to Mass, continued to have a central place in my memories. I have forgotten the names of the plays we saw or slept through. However, I vividly remember a meal at Sardi’s Restaurant where we had a very thick, rare and over-crusted “hambourger.”
We also went with the college group for an evening at the Latin Quarter Nightclub. A traveling hostess took a photograph of the two of us and placed it in a folder with a very lively, but unclad, dancer on the cover. Later, when my Italian grandmother was handed the print, within its provocative folder, and told here was a picture of my girlfriend, she tossed it on the floor with great distain – until she was informed the photograph was inside, not outside.
The subway system was a revelation for both of us. It is there we encountered the shabby man who became, for us, the “prophet of the subway” – a homeless resident who shouted inanities at us as we awaited a train on the opposite platform.
Few of the other details of the tour have remained, but what we planted there was the seed for the later, formal engagement which occurred when I was a graduate student at Cornell. That New York event had its own story. It began once more, with Spring Break at Kent State.
I had invited Karen to spend this Break with me in Ithaca. I had planned on giving her a true engagement ring. I had carefully arranged for everything – except for one thing.
The day of the evening she was to leave Kent on the train for Ithaca, I had an attack of itching red spots. I thought I should probably go to the Cornell Infirmary just to be sure everything was fine, since the campus had been under a German measles alert for several weeks. Yes, the results were positive for me, too. I was allowed one phone-call before being confined overnight to an infirmary bed. I called Karen’s sorority house, but she was not there. I left a message; one I was not sure she would really believe. “Don’t come! I have German measles.”
Two weeks later, on April 1, I journeyed back to Kent when Cornell had its own Spring Break. There on a stone bench at the top of the hill on the front campus, near the bridge joining the Humanities and the Sciences buildings, I presented her with an engagement ring. We have visited this memorial site every time we’ve returned to the campus over the past six decades. There would, no doubt, have been a different result if she had not said “yes.”